It’s July 4th, 2020 and I turned 22 today. Well, to be more precise I was born around 2:30 am this morning. I spent so many of my birthdays with a negative perspective that if I wasn’t where I wanted to be my existence on Earth was worthless. That thought process has vanished and I’m now able to see my purpose, my potential and my unique abilities with clarity. Of course, each year we learn, grow and heal in different ways in which, all depend on what life puts in our path. The decisions we make lead us to where we are. I went through a lot of hardship to make it where I am today with my head more so on my shoulders rather then lost in the clouds. My goals, dreams and aspirations are much more solid and inspirational. Happy birthday to me, I killed it the last year and have came so far!
LET’S GET INTO IT. I love to share the thing’s I’ve learned in hopes that others will take it and use it to their advantage to learn, grow and heal themselves.
22 THINGS I LEARNED BEFORE 22:
ONE: You must make yourself your number one priority, every single day.
TWO: You must learn when to say “yes” when you don’t want/need to do something, and you must learn when to say “no” when you need to challenge your comfort zone. You are the only person who can make decisions for yourself.
THREE: You are allowed to remove ANYONE from your life that is toxic to you or not benefiting you as an individual and the life you deserve/desire to live. Family, friends, coworkers, anyone.
FOUR: It is okay to need help, to ask for help and to struggle. Struggle simply means it is time to start learning, growing and healing to be a better version of yourself. Without struggle, we would never know the worth of happiness and being content.
FIVE: Struggling with mental health does not make you weak or broken and you can overcome it by seeking professional help and dedicating to a treatment plan. There are resources all over the place but I recommend an appointment with your family physician to get things rolling.
SIX: You should have an idea of what your core values, morals and beliefs are to ensure you are acting, speaking and setting goals that reflect your true inner self. There are many worksheets and prompt questions online to figure out what yours are.
SEVEN: We are so much harder on ourselves then we would ever be on anyone else. A lot of people hear this but don’t acknowledge it. Treat your self like you would treat you most loved ones. Acknowledge you deserve to be treated respectfully, with kindness and love just as you give others, always.
EIGHT: Diet culture is seriously harming our society. Eating a well balanced diet with all the food groups at least for breakfast, lunch and dinner is essential for proper nourishment, energy and regular function. Your body is your home, take care of it just like you would take care of your loved ones. No this will not make you “fat” or gain weight.
NINE: Take risks and try new things as often as possible. Explore the opportunities that come your way to see if you like or dislike it. Never stop learning about life and learning about yourself. Experience as much as you can in as many different forms as possible, make your life an uplifting adventure.
TEN: Your energy and efforts are precious for your overall well being. When giving your energy and efforts out to others, make sure that these are the type of people that will do the same for you. If its for strangers, make sure you have enough energy and effort left over at the end of the day for yourself, if not, then don’t. And that’s not selfish.
ELEVEN: Relationships come and go. Relationships should always be a safe haven, with good communication, listening and understanding. A relationship is about partnership with a lover but also a friend/best friend. They should be based around seeking growth, healing, learning and building as a team. Equal give and take from both parties. You’re in your twenties, don’t let a heartbreak dwell too long this is all about learning about what you want and need in a partner. If you’re in your twenties, don’t let a break up destroy you. Learn, grow, heal and focus on loving yourself fully before committing to a relationship unless you’re growing healthily together.
TWELVE: Make amends with people and get rid of any grudges you’re holding. If this person accepts, then you just gained a friend and a great sigh of relief. If they don’t, that’s okay they aren’t ready but you can be ready for forgiveness and let the pressures release by allowing yourself to forgive them and/or yourself. Accepting that not everyone will forgive you or a situation that occurred means forgiveness in your own mind can flourish and you can move forward.
THIRTEEN: Getting away from your electronics, internet, data and social media is crucial for you health. You deserve and need to experience the precious moments of life and sometimes it’s so much more worth the picture of the moment to be taken in your mind than, on your phone. You’ll be so surprised how much more present you are and how much more you absorb in these precious moments.
FOURTEEN: Make new friends, socialize and create a circle of friends that represent/supports your own goals, motivation, that make you feel healthy and happy and support you, as much as you want to do the same for them. A healthy, happy circle of friends is a game changer because who you surround yourself with will reflect your own actions and decisions in your own life. Don’t be scared to let go of your current friends because you’ve outgrown them and want to be surrounded by people that represent/support you more.
FIFTEEN: Bloom outwards and try new hobbies; get creative. You are human and you actually do need to express yourself so through trial and error find the hobby that makes you absolutely inspired and drives you to go out and participate in it. A hobby can dramatically increase your happiness, work ethic, potential and ability to express yourself in both good and bad times. I would love to do a blog post on my personal experience trying to find my hobby and the ones I did through trial and error to find the ones perfect for me. Leave a comment at the end of this post or email me if you would like to see this.
SIXTEEN: Life is constantly changing and you are constantly having to adapt to it and make decisions about what you’re going to do next, how you’re going to respond, what you’re going to say, and how to resolve situations. Don’t be afraid to make “mistakes” because all they are, are lessons learned to grow from. You are evolving every day, you get to chose if you evolution will be positive or negative. Aim for the positive and growth. You are responsible.
SEVENTEEN: You are solely responsible for your feelings and actions. No one else can control your feelings or actions thus, you must learn to self-soothe yourself, to think before you act to ensure you’re acting inline with your core beliefs and values, and hold yourself responsible for any change, negative feelings or consequences that occur. You are the sole provider and guide of your life, chose wisely and in truth to your inner self/intuition.
EIGHTEEN: Suicide, drug abuse and eating disorders can be some of the hardest mental health struggles to overcome. They are illnesses and romanticizing them will only make things more unclear for yourself with reality and thinking rationally. Challenging yourself through recovery is one of the absolute best things you can ever do for yourself. You will find a brightness, a happiness, a purity you have never felt before with recovery. Recovery is a challenge, but the ultimate challenge of learning to know who you really are, what you truly want and to see your worth in the world a.k.a the potential of all that you are capable of. Also, another topic that I would love to blog about, leave a comment if you would like to hear about it.
NINETEEN: Being a drop out from university/college and taking years off from school does not make you a failure. If anything, it makes you experience more of “real life” and what you may actually want to pursue as a career if you decide to go through for post secondary education. You do not have to be a certain age to attain your education, marriage, children etc. and you don’t need to want it either. This is YOUR life; live the life that YOU want to live.
TWENTY: Stand up for what you believe in and battle wholeheartedly for the things you believe and stand by personally. Never stop believing in bettering your self, the world and empowering the world/others with change on things you believe need to change. Put your mark out on the world and stand by kindness, respect and empowering the best of you, the best of others and the best of the world. You are so much stronger and more powerful than you may believe. Get out there and prove it to yourself. Get involved.
TWENTY-ONE: Be who you are wholesomely, truly and passionately each and every day because as our birthdays pass, the years begin to pass even faster. Set out goals that you feel inspired by. Don’t be scared of what others think of you, only focus on loving yourself and the people that belong in your life will natural stay or find their way to you. Don’t be so hard on yourself with your appearance, your feelings, your thoughts, what you want to do, who you want to be, simply be who you are in honesty. Do that thing you’ve been dying to do. Stop making excuses around getting or doing that thing that you crave and want so badly. Make things happen and go get everything you aspire. Remember to reflect on the simple aspects and little moments in life; never take the simplicity of life for granted. You are unique and so so, powerful.
TWENTY-TWO: I have no idea what all my 22nd year of life will completely consist. But I’ve learned to always keep moving forward with a positive perspective. Also, to be open to new possibilities, change, and jump at opportunities that you that benefit you. The unknown can be fearful. The unknown means there’s so much left to discover.
Yes, I learned a lot more then just 22 things during the 22 years from being welcomed into this crazy beautiful world and motioning through my crazy beautiful life. But, I hope everyone who reads this can take at least one of the points and explore it for themselves so they can grow, learn and heal just like I have learned to do so.
Let me know through email or leaving a comment on the contact tab at the top if there are any points here you want me to elaborate/write on or, if there is something different you want me to post about. Much love.